Thursday, May 05, 2005


The safety inspector for the state just left my class. I have a passing grade. I have a safe classroom and shop.

On to other news ... Sometimes it is so easy to be generous in acceptance. Other times it just seems easier to be harsh. It takes so much less work to find that place where something someone does in appealing. I try not to judge others by what I might do in their situation. Still, at times, the easy road of intolerance seems like the best way. In my heart, I know. In my head, I even know. Somewhere between head and heart, and my mouth, the message gets lost.

There is a Trace Adkins song, that I have karaoke'd, called, "I'm Trying". ... And I am.

I wonder if it is just a spilling over. There are so many times when other things seem to call for that rage: driving, shopping, standing in line at the bank, and 1000 other times when time stands still and some moron has gummed up the works. How much of that does it take before the lines between that and the way we deal with friends and family become blurred? I am not looking for an excuse. I am looking for explanations. I must make a constant conscience choice to extend love and tolerance to everyone. I don't have to agree. I don't have to think it is a good thing. I don't have to endorse the action. I DO need gentle understanding. I need more of it out from within as well as some from without inward. Regardless, I have to live with me. Lately, living in my skin has been a struggle. Perhaps that is sunshine I see breaking the horizon. OR ... Maybe it is the lights of an oncoming train ...

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