Time
We are approaching another milestone
One more year since you went from us
There are days you are closer than ever
And then, there are days you are far away
I can sit, close my eyes, become very still
I allow the images of you to flood my mind
I hear your voice as if you are speaking today
Memories and questions surround me
For you, all time has ceased
You are not growing older
Everything about you is a memory
Every question already has it’s answer
For me, time is still fluid and alive
Fragments travel past in memories stream
I can catch and hold pieces temporarily
Before the swift currents of time steal them away
Let’s talk about time
Time is the ultimate taker and giver
Time tries to destroy all things
What it cannot destroy, it alters completely
I am not the same as I was thirteen years ago
Not the same man who sat at your bedside
Not the same as the one meeting with the doctors
Not like to one relinquishing hope for reality
I try and succeed at remembering good days
The times we laughed and cried together
The conversations we thought would be endless
The numerous holidays we celebrated
Always, time brings me back
Always, time makes me know
Always, feeling the immeasurable void
Knowing what I had and have no longer
I know it is time which gives me so much
Time has given me children, grandchildren
And even recently, a great grandson
None possible without the passing of time
It is the same passage of time
Giving so much, taking so much
Inexorably twisted together
Bound by an unbreakable line
For now, I will struggle to stand still
In the rushing stream of time
To feel your presence around me
To know your heart and mind
To hear your voice and your words
To relive moments, to recapture feelings
To stop it all from slipping away
To never lose you in times rushing
It is but for the moment
I am tethered to time
I am restrained by its whims
I am a captive within its bounds
Even now
I can feel the edge of change
I can feel the destruction
Eroding the periphery
I cling to you with desperation
Losing you is losing myself
I refuse to give in to this jailer
I cannot relinquish the memories
Time
You will not destroy this
You will not alter this
I will not give in
So many years, so much change
Situations and circumstances
New wrinkles, new aches and pains
New loves and new worries
This, still, I will hold
Just beyond your flow
I will rehearse your stories
I will not give them to time
I close my eyes, I get very still
I sharpen the focus
Thanks for being strong enough
To assuage the ravages of time
Another year
Another day
Another hour
Time
© Ron Simpson Jr.
February 29, 2020
