Major Milestone Achieved

August 8, 2010:

I decide that enough is enough. I weigh in at 350 pounds. This is not the heaviest I have been (weighed in once at the DR office at 362) but it is heavy enough. I told TJ (Wife) that I wanted to change the way I eat. I realize that I need to change everything about my eating habits. I eat wrong. I eat at the wrong times. I eat the wrong things. I eat the wrong amounts. I eat for the wrong reasons. That changes August 9th, the first full day of my new life.

I plan to lose 130 pounds in 12 months.

August 15, 2010:

After one week on the modified eating plan, I have lost 12 pounds and decide it is time to up the ante. I need to increase my activity. I decide it is time to start walking. Up to this point I have walked for a while with a cane and then only when I deemed walking to be entirely necessary. You know, there is usually someone that will get that for you, or go into the store for you, or do the errand for you. While being helpful, my wife and kids enabled my excuses. I put excuses behind and take a walk around the block. It is one/third of a mile. It took me 20 minutes and I came home breathing hard and sweating.

August, September, October, and November:

The distance I walked on my daily walk increases. I usually do 2 miles but have had days of nearly 4 miles. November 11, I pass the 100 miles walked for exercise mark.

My daily calorie intake has dropped over 70%, from over 3500 to around 1050 calories.

Today:

It has been 113 days since I changed my life, literally.

My waist has gone from 58 inches to 47.5 inches.

My hips have gone from 60 inches to 48.5 inches.

My BMI has gone from 53.2 to 43.3.

One hundred thirteen days and my weight has dropped from 350 pounds to 285 pounds. I have lost 65 pounds. That is half of the 130 pounds I plan to lose.

Sixteen weeks and one day and I have lost 22 inches from my waist and hips. Even my wedding ring is nearly too large for my fingers. My face is smaller. My feet are smaller. I can bend over and touch the floor again.

This is the new me.

Today, I am half way to the me I will be again!

Thanksgiving success

It was a great thanksgiving, for which I am grateful.

I didn't go over in my calories and enjoyed practically all of my holiday favorites. I had: Turkey, Ham, Stuffing, Green Beans, Corn, Mashed Potatoes, Gravy, and Baked Mac-n-Cheese. I had them all in moderation.

My weekly calories prior to T-Day were:

Friday - 1149

Saturday - 1019

Sunday - 1013

Monday - 1117

Tuesday - 890

Wednesday - 707

And, my calories for Thanksgiving Day .. 1022

The average calorie intake for the seven days including Thanksgiving is 988 calories a day. The daily average for the month of November (so far) is 1015 calories a day. (Now, before you fuss .. I am being supervised by my doctor and she is good with my calorie intake as long as everything keeps functioning properly.)

I can't really say that I was concerned about overeating yesterday. I knew my new eating discipline would prevail. (Although, it did look like a lot of food on the plate.)

I did stay away from all the pies. There were (and still are to some degree) apple, cherry, pecan, and pumpkin pies. I will, at some point this week/weekend have a small slice of pie, but even then it will be much less than my last years normal eating.

Let me be the first to say, I don't feel I have given up anything in this new eating plan. I still eat the things I love. I eat them with a new moderation, but I still eat what I like. I think one of the biggest downfalls in dieting is the idea that you have to give up the foods you love. It is not necessarily true.

My favorite sandwich is simple and loaded with fat and calories. It is a bologna and cheese sandwich with Miracle Whip and onions. I used to eat them many times for lunch. Unfortunately, I would normally eat two of them, to the whopping calories total of well over 1000 calories. I don't do that now. One sandwich, on thinner bread, eaten every now and then.

We cook better. We use lighter substitutes. We don't compromise taste. We cook lighter and eat less.

It was a greatly successful Thanksgiving Day.

I hope yours was as well.

And .. my weigh-in for today .. 288 pounds .. down one more pound

What? A new size ?

OK, so most of my pants don't fit anymore. I still have a few pair that I can wear. Some of them only bunch up a little under my belt. I posted recently that I found a pair of khaki's in the closet that I looked at and said to myself, "Those will never fit." They were waist size 50. A couple hangers over were another pair of pants that I used to wear that were a waist size 60.

Just to see how much farther i had to go, I tried on the 50's. To my shock, I didn't have to go any farther. They fit!

Yesterday, my wife was at a local buy out store. They buy out lots from stores that are overstock or closeout merchandise. She called me to tell me they had some black St John's Bay dress slacks for $2 and asked if I wanted a couple pair. Well, I do need pants and $2 was a great buy. I told her yes. She said they had 50's and 48's. I told her to get me the 50's as it was what I was wearing.

She came home with two pair; one size 50 and one size 48. I figured I could wear the 50's and work on fitting into the 48's. I tried on the 50's. They fit just fine, but I do have to hem them.

So, I tried on the 48's to see how close I was to fitting into them.

Oh My Gosh !! They fit ?!?!?!

I fit into a waist size 48 pants for the first time in I can't remember.

Let the good times roll !

Late Weigh-in

I didn't get the opportunity to weigh in this weekend as we were busy and didn't visit mom's house. I use her scale for several reasons; a few of those being, it is a DR type scale, it is where I weighed when I began, and it is far enough away to prevent me from obsessing and weighing every day.

So, this weekend's weigh-in was pushed back until today.

The results of the weighing are that I lost another 2 pounds last week. This brings my total weight loss to 61 pounds in 14 weeks. I have gone from 350 pounds on August 8 to 289 pounds on November 15.

I can not even begin to catalog all the changes that losing 61 pounds brings. Someone asked me if it felt better being this much lighter. I had to say yes, but, I feel better in ways I wasn't aware that I felt bad.

When you gain weight slowly, you grow accustomed to the limitations and restrictions gradually. Sure, you notice the big differences. You notice how hard it is to get up and out. you notice how much more effort it takes to do things. You notice how clothes fit tighter or how you have to buy bigger sizes.

However, there are changes you don't notice because they happen so gradually, or it isn't something you do all the time.

There are changes in how long you can stand before pain makes you sit. There are numerous endurance limit changes.

I notice now how I can stand for much longer periods without having to sit down. I notice how I am not constantly shifting my weight from one leg to the next to be comfortable. I notice I walk down steps one step at a time instead of making half steps. (This is where you bring a foot down to one step and then the other foot to the same step, and repeat.)

I notice I don't hurt as much. I don't breath as hard. I don't snore as loud (well, I didn't notice that one. I was told.)

So, yes, it does feel much better. It feels better in ways that will only be evident as I encounter them, but, encounter them, I will.

289 !!

100 miles

August 8th, I was 350 pounds. It was not the heaviest I had been, but it was plenty heavy enough. I decided to change my life.

August 17, one week into my new lifestyle, I decided that walking would be good for me. Later that evening (11ish) I took off for a walk around the block. Firstly, I live in a small town (pop. 5600,) so; it was safe to be out walking around that late at night. Secondly, it was just 1/3 of a mile.

It took me 20 minutes. Yes, I was walking at the blazing speed of one mile per hour. Oh yeah, it wore me out as well.

August 18, I did it again, albeit much earlier. August 19, I did it three times that day and reached my first mile walking day.

By the end of August, I had walked one 1.8 mile day and had walked 9.75 miles for exercise. I only count the walking I do specifically for exercise.

By the end of September, I had walked a personal best day of 3.28 miles and had walked 43.78 miles that month and achieved a 53.53 mile total.

By the end of October, I had walked a personal best day of 3.9 miles and had walked 41.25 miles that month and achieved a 95.05 mile total.

November started out badly for walking. As you may have read in the previous post, I didn’t walk but one day in the first week. Yesterday, I was determined to get back into the flow of walking. I walked 1.4 miles on Wednesday. Today, I walked 2.4 miles. This brought my total miles, in one week shy of three months, to 100.67 miles walked.

Now, my brother is a runner. He runs 5 to 7 miles a day. Some days he runs 10 or more. He is preparing for a marathon. 100 miles is a couple weeks to him. But, for me, it is a major thing. I was not a walker or runner. Now, I did run in high school, but that was decades ago. (35 years to be exact.)

So, just endure me while I celebrate reaching the 100 mile walking milestone.

Yip yip yippeeeeee !

getting back on track

The last seven days have been rather hectic and detrimental to exercising. There have been Doctor visits, hospital stays, surgery, son's wedding planning, daughter's moving, and car selling. Yeah, seems like an average week. In the seven day stretch, I managed to get in one hour of walking.

This morning started out trying to be busy (son-in-law issues) but I was determined. I walked 1.66 miles, including a stop at the courthouse to file the marriage license from last nights wedding.

I hate when I don't get to walk.

I never thought I would be one of those. You know who they are. You see them out all hours of the morning, throughout the day, and even late in the evenings. You see them in their walking suits or jogging suits. You see them walking, oblivious to the weather and other distractions. you see their headphones in as they go along. They are the 'walkers'. I never thought I would be inducted into their tribe.

Yet, there I am, in the morning, putting on my walking pants and tightening up my walking shoes. I am checking the battery in my mp3 player (I listen to the Bible as I walk.) I am checking the time to know how long it took me to walk my walk. I am making sure I have my phone for emergencies. I am checking off the list.

Phone ............... check
MP3 ....................check
Key .....................check
Sunglasses ........check

So far, my longest walks have been in the 3 to 4 mile ranges, which takes me 60 to 80 minutes. No extra hydration needed on my walks. I am, however, on the lookout for the dreaded 'fanny-pack' for the time when my walks grow to longer distances and times that might require some additional H2O.

So, today, determination in hand, I got back to the walks.

59 pounds and the next wall to fall

My latest weigh-in yielded the results of 59 pounds lost in 13 weeks. That is astounding to me. As I have said in the past, I wish this was the hardest thing I have ever done, so I would have an excuse for not doing it 20 years ago, but it isn't. It has been easy for the most part. The hardest part, probably, was coming to the place where I said I was going to do it.

I have gone from my starting point of 350 pounds (not my heaviest) to today's weight of 291 pounds.

The next wall to fall:

I was in my closet looking for clothes to wear a couple days ago. All my jeans and slacks fit me if I don't mind holding the extra 6 inches of waist material while I walk. Or, if I don't mind 6 inches or more of material bunched up under my belt. I did find one pair of khaki's that looked (in my eyes estimation) to be way too small. I checked the size and the tag read '50 waist'. "There is no way these will fit," I told myself.

So, I put them on, and to my amazement, they fit and fit right. A 50 !! No freaking way !!

So, the next wall to fall (since the 300 pound wall fell) is the 50 inch waist wall. I am looking forward to the day when my pants waist size will be in the 40's.

I am leaning against that wall now.

Pushing !!

The Cost of Carelessness

We were busy yesterday running numerous errands and my wife neglected to lay out anything for supper. This was not that big of an issue, as we did have 'carry out' options available. TJ wanted pizza, so we headed to the local Little Caesar's for some hot and ready pizza.

Now, the local joint doesn't cut their pizza's very well. This is fine as we re-cut them at home and make them a 10 slice pizza instead of an 8 slice pizza. This makes them about 200 calories a slice. The 1/8th slice is still only around 250 calories, which isn't terrible, either.

Well, when I went in to pick up some hot and ready's, I found a large line and an empty pizza holder thingie. Their hot and ready's were neither hot nor ready. The worker told me it was going to be 25 minutes until pizza's were ready. I wasn't in the mood to wait, nor go home and come back, so we went to the Pizza Hut which was about a half block away.

We decided to eat in at the Pizza hut. We ordered the large meat lovers for the three of us. I drank water (I hate paying $2 for a soft drink at restaurants.) Normally, knowing I would be going to a restaurant, I will research the calorie contents to make sure my choices are good, but this was a spur of the moment choice. I assumed the calories would be similar since it was still bread, meat, cheese, and sauce.

WRONG !

The difference was staggering, as I discovered after eating. I had three slices of pizza, thinking I would be in the 600 to 800 calorie range. I had less than 400 calories in the first two meals of the day and figured 800 would be fine. It would put me a little above my average, but still within what i consider acceptable.

1 slice of Pizza Hut's Meat Lovers Pizza is 480 calories !!!

Oh My Gosh !!

In that one meal, I had taken in more calories (1440) than I had taken in on any day (total) in the past three months. The total for the day was 1859 calories.

Sigh .. It is just a one day thing, I tell myself. It was just the result of carelessness. It will not change the fact that I have lost over 50 pounds. It will not change the fact that I am more active and feel better than I have in years. It will not change the fact that I have lost 9 inches in both my waist and my hips.

It will change how I eat in restaurants. I will ask for a nutrition guide before I order if I do not already know the calories and such.

This is much too important to get careless after 12 weeks of hard work.

Viva la revolucion !

Welcome to the new 'me'

There is an old gospel song that has a line or two in it like this:

"When I look back down the road, where I laid my heavy load, and I'm thankful for the victories I've won. Sometimes I get a thrill, when I look back down the hill, and I see just where the Lord has brought me from."

That may or may not be exactly right, but it is as close as my memory will get me.

This is the tenth week of my changed lifestyle. Some folks like to use the word 'diet' to describe what I am doing. I prefer to think of it as a lifestyle change. When we think of diets, we think of something that is temporary. Of course, that is just what the problem is; most diets are temporary. A person notices they are 10, 20, 50, 100 pounds overweight and they begin a diet to correct it. Once they lose the goal weight, they go off the diet. It has done what it was supposed to do. Then they go back to the lifestyle they had before. That's the problem. Their excess weight was a product of the lifestyle they had before and they have just returned to it. In time, they will gain back the lost weight (and generally more) because they haven't changed their eating habits permanently.

My primary goal and focus of my attention right now is to lose 130 pounds in a year. My goal year began August 8, 2010. I weighed 350 pounds on that day and that was not even the heaviest I have been. It was just what I weighed on that date.

My primary goal is to get my weight back down to 220 pounds.

Here is what I am doing to accomplish this:

• I changed my eating.

• I changed my inactive life.

Allow me to elaborate about the changes.

I changed my eating. This has been a radical change in some ways. Let me first say, I always had healthy eating in my food consumption.

• I didn’t eat a lot of fried foods.

• I didn’t eat a lot of sweets.

• I ate a goodly amount of vegetables.

My problem wasn’t as much what I ate as how much I ate. Even eating healthy foods can be a problem when you eat too much of them. Without actually counting them, my wife estimates I was taking in between 3000 and 3500 calories a day. Those were the calories she saw. There were some days she didn’t see all the things I would eat.

I can tell you this, not as an excuse that I suffer from hypothyroidism. My thyroid tells my brain that I am starving most of the time. I was generally and genuinely hungry most of the time. I am on medication to control it, but the medication cannot control the habits acquired before the problem was diagnosed.

My usual consumption (if eating out fast food) included:

• Wendy’s – 2 singles with cheese and a biggie fry

• McDonalds – a quarter pounder with cheese, a big mac, and large fries

• Taco Bell – 2 beefy 5 layer burritos and a chicken soft ranchero taco

• Burger King – a triple whopper with cheese and a large onion ring

You should be able to see a problem already.

Then, when eating at home, I would have two bologna with cheese sandwiches for lunch and a full supper later, followed by late night snacking. I would sit at the computer and graze all evening. I would open a big bag of chips and eat my way through most of it unconsciously. I would say that 3000 to 3500 calories might have been an optimistic estimate.

Now, on to the non-existent exercise. There isn’t a lot to tell here, since exercise didn’t happen. I walked, when I deemed it absolutely necessary, with a cane. When shopping, I used the cart for support. There was little or no moving around during the day. I have been off work for a while, so there was no going to work and moving there. I worked construction before, but for the four years before becoming unemployed, I was teaching. This entailed moving from the desk to the chalkboard or from the desk in the classroom to the desk in the shop. Again, this was little or no exercise.

That was where I was, on the road, on August 8th, when I decided to change things. There was not a catastrophe in my life. There was not a cataclysmic event that triggered the change. I was visiting a relative in the hospital. He was near 500 pounds and was in the hospital due to an infected port. They had removed the port and were keeping him a few days to insure the infection was under control. He told the hospital that he was dieting so they put him on a low calorie diet plan. He had just finished dinner when I got there to visit. While I was there he had his wife order him a sub sandwich from a local sub shop. In that moment, I saw my future.

At that moment, my lifestyle changed.

I went home that evening, had supper, and didn’t eat anything afterwards. I told my wife that I was changing my eating starting the next day. The truth being told, I started right then. I didn’t snack that evening at all.

I am, in no wise, suggesting that anyone follow my example as far as how much or what they eat. You have to find the plan that works for you. You have to eat in a way that satisfies you or you will not continue. My daily caloric intake dropped from 3500+ to between 900 and 1100 a day. I wish I could tell you that it was the hardest thing I have ever done, but it wasn’t. If it were the hardest thing I had ever done, then I might be able to hang on to my excuses. Compared to the health issues related to gaining and weighing 500 pounds, it was relatively simple.

I have: a slim-fast drink (190 calories) in the morning for protein; a salad (275 to 325 calories) or healthy sub (320 to 360 calories) for lunch; and a moderate supper (whatever I want for around 400 to 600 calories.)

I lose twelve pounds the first week.

Week two began the exercising portion of my life change. I walked around my block. To be fair, the cross streets included a steep incline. However, it was 1/3 of a mile and the first trip took me 20 minutes and almost killed me. I did it without my cane. By the end of the first week, I had logged in 2.96 miles in walking. I know it isn’t a lot to some, but to me, it was 2.96 miles more than I would have walked otherwise. Then, it began to grow.

• Week 2 – 3.29 miles

• Week 3 – 7.71 miles

• Week 4 – 13.33 miles

• Week 5 – 11.27 miles

• Week 6 – 11.04 miles

• Week 7 – 6 miles (had several days with interfering events that prevented walking)

• Week 8 – 7.33 miles (same as above)

Still, even with interfering events, I have walked almost 65 miles since I started walking for exercise. Nine weeks of eating differently, and 8 weeks of moving differently, and I have lost down to 302 pounds. That is an unprecedented 48 pounds. I am two days from this week’s weigh-in, but feel this week may get me down to at least 300, maybe even under it.

Let’s say, for the sake of argument that I do lose 130 pounds in the time I chose. What do I do then? Do I end my diet? Do I end my exercise (I have added some strength training now as well)?

I mean, the diet has done its job. It has accomplished its task. Isn’t it time to discard it?

That would be like throwing away all the work I did to get to my goal weight.

There would be some slight modifications, as my goal would no longer be to lose weight.

I don’t think I could ever go back to the ‘me’ I was before. My new eating plan is just my eating plan now. It isn’t new and it isn’t temporary. My walking plan isn’t new anymore and it isn’t temporary either. It is just part of me now. Eventually, I will run as my weight allows the pressure on my knees. That, when it comes, will just become part of me too.

Welcome to the new me.

Sometimes I get a thrill, when I look back down the hill, and I see just where the Lord has brought me from.

Wedding Anniversary

Today is my 7th year wedding anniversary.

So far, the day has gone like this:

*Wife had to take daughter to work (60 miles round trip .. unplanned)

*Youngest son starts puking just before he was supposed to leave for school

*I took a 2 mile walk alone (wife planned on walking with me .. see event #1)

*Took sleeper sofa to son's house (another 40 mile round trip)

*Cut out about 15 feet row of hedges (over 6 feet tall .. burned over 500 calories .. Yipee)

*Finally stopped for lunch (healthy salad .. around 300 calories)

Let's see how the rest of this anniversary day goes ..

DR's office .. yeah!

The DR's office called me yesterday to follow up on my complaint. They were very apologetic and eager to get me in to see my doctor as soon as I could get there. We settled on an 8:40 AM appointment today. It was very different than Tuesday's fiasco.

I arrived on time. I barely got checked in and seated before they were calling me back to the exam rooms. As we were walking back toward the room I would be in, we passed my doctor in the hall. She greeted me, "Hi Ron!" and told me I was next to be seen.

Her nurse checked my vitals and as soon as she left the doctor came in.

We chatted about my diet and the changes I have made for about 25 minutes. She asked all sorts of questions and offered good advice. She, basically, told me that since what I was doing was working, keep it up. She told me what to look for as danger signs if there were going to be problems. There were none of them.

She told me that we needed to recheck my thyroid soon, but since her office lab charges a lot and I am without insurance now, she told me of a local place that charges a lot less, but she couldn't remember the name. She said she would find it and send it to me.

She checked my legs (I do suffer from some edema ... fluid retention) and was very pleased with what she found. She checked my heart and said it sounded great. She checked my breathing and, again, it was great. She checked my blood pressure. She told me that my BP always surprised her. She said, by my size, she always expected it to be high. It was 120/78, which was great. My pulse rate was great.

She checked my glands and remarked that, for the first time, she could get her hands around my throat to check them at the same time. (Good changes.)

We talked about my walking and exercising. I took her a printout (excel spreadsheet) of my daily calories, Carbohydrates, fats, protein, and walking for the past seven and a half weeks. We talked about my meds. I am currently only prescribed meds for my thyroid, but also take an OTC Claritin, a multivitamin, magnesium, and two ibuprofen (for tendonitis in my heels) every morning. She was happy with that.

We talked about her son, her parents, my wife and kids. We talked about singing. (Her office manager told her I complained about the last visit but sang her praises. She told the OM that, in fact, I did sing. She thought it was humorous that the OM used that particular phrase.)

It was a great visit.

After the visit I stopped by mom's to let her know what the DR said and did a 'day early' weigh-in. I won't count it as official until I weigh-in tomorrow while I am in town to get a haircut. But, unofficially, I weighed in at 305 pounds. This brings my total weight loss in 8 weeks to 45 pounds. Unofficially, of course.

Hope your week has been a great one.

Poetry .. Questions

Questions

If, by inattention

I allowed you to become my life

And then you walked away

If, even by design

I made you my whole life

And then you weren’t there

If, foolishly I guess

I lost myself in the wraps of you

And suddenly you slipped through

If, of late

I took you for granted and leaned too hard

And then you were gone

If, I only saw

The things about you I loved

And then there was something I disliked

If, by some twist of chance

You became my foundation

But you left, in the storm

If, I unwittingly

Became completely dependent

Then you did something unexpected

If, you became my rock

But turned out to be

A rolling stone

If, I made you my comfort

In the darkest of nights

And then couldn't find you in the blackness

If, my laugh

Became tied to your laugh

And then I couldn't hear it

If, my tears

Knew your wiping hand

But then, it wasn't there to stop them

Did you know

How much I let you become

And did it chase you away

Did my life

So entwined with yours

Begin to choke a little

Was I

Too dependent

Too independent

Was I

Too close

Too far away

Was I

Not enough

Too much

Will I

Love again

Trust to love again

Will I

Find another heart

Will I even look

Sigh,

There is no one

To hear my heart

As it continues

To ask the questions

If I

Did I

Was I

Will I

Questions

Ron Simpson, Jr.

September 13, 2010

I think my body is staging a revolt ..

Last week was a phenomenal week for me in the weight loss arena.

I increased my walking and walked a total of 13.3 miles on my mostly morning walks.

I decreased my calorie intake without trying.

I don't stay hungry like I did before. Part of this is due to a thyroid condition, and part of it was due to a long time habit of eating (grazing) most of the day. I eat my regularly scheduled meals and typically avoid the snacks. Last month, of the 22 days I charted my eating, my snacks averaged 76.1 calories. This month (12 days in) my snacks are averaging 37.1 and in the last 7 days, 15.1 calories.

Yesterday morning, I was up nearly 2 hours before my alarm was set to go off. I was ready to take my 2 mile morning walk. Typically, I walk from my house and go out 1 mile or more and then I walk back. This way, once I have made the first part, I have almost no choice (except for the embarrassing call home .. come get me, honey) but to finish the walk.

Out the door I went with my timer set, and all the necessary parts and pieces in my pockets. I hadn't gone very far when my body said to me, "you do not want to be too far from the house this morning." (A fairly moderate sense of decorum prevents me from going into detail here.) So, with much disappointment I went only 1/2 mile out and 1/2 mile back and made it to the relative safety of the house and near proximity of the bathroom. Still, I did walk a mile.

Here comes Monday morning. It seems that nothing has changed. I did manage, albeit late, a 1 mile walk, but did not feel comfortable going much farther from the house.

There has been some sickness in the house lately and it seems to be affecting me as well. My wife and son just went to the DR and were diagnosed with Strep Throat. I haven't had any of the throat pain, but the queasy and uncomfortable stomach has stayed with me again today.

Maybe my body is staging a revolt. Well, it has ruled for long enough. I am taking back my life and my health.

Shorter walks are OK. There is a stationary bike just outside this room. On it I can go and go and go, and never get any farther from the bathroom.

Take that .

poetry .. for 9-11

I wrote this following the 9-11 attacks, when all the talk was about hate and retaliation .. It is not what this great nation was built upon .. More and more today, I see us united, not by our love, but by our hatred and intolerance .. there was a great man that said that we were "dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. We are now engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation, so conceived and so dedicated can long endure."

I will not teach my children to hate

How do I teach my children?

Is it in the abundance of the words I say?

Can words turn their hearts,

When they are held in my actions sway;

What example have I fashioned,

Living in my day to day,

Every harsh or cruel word,

Molding hearts like pliant clay;

What acts of kindness,

Will influence their way,

To which memory will they turn

When passions begin to stray;

When attacks defy reason,

And retaliation seems the way,

Which lesson will stay them,

And let love rule the day;

Please, let me not teach them

A hardness of spirit or heart,

Please, let me show them

Where hatred doesn’t have a part;

Let my actions be tempered,

Make my words wrath turning,

Let me lead them in deed,

Now and forever learning;

A softness of heart,

Is not weakness implied,

It is just the shining out,

Of loves flame inside;

Which flickering flame,

I have sought carefully to tend,

Until brightly it burns,

In today’s fiercest wind;

I do not fear times ravage,

Nor put my trust in fate,

I face the future with pride,

I have not taught my children to hate

Ron Simpson, Jr.

October 20, 2001

My Walk .. Interrupted

Today was going to the the day I broke the 2 mile barrier. I plotted my course. I had it all planned. I was going to actually walk 2.1 miles. The excitement was building. OK, I am kidding about the building excitement, but I was looking forward to the idea of surpassing another milestone (literally.)

As stated, I had plotted out the course. It was a slightly rolling path. There were some up and some downs. There were some small hills and some larger hills. There was nothing like the hill to the cemetery of earlier this week.

Out the door I went. I usually leave right after TJ leaves to take the kids to work. Today, however, I was early. I wanted to give myself some extra time. I was walking the way she goes when she takes the kids to work. I would be seeing her on my way (bonus!)

I walked and walked and walked. I didn't see her. I figured she must have left late or had to go another way because of a need to stop at a store or something. Just after I passed the turn around point of yesterday, my phone rang. I fished it out of my pocket to see "private number." I didn't answer it as I didn't want to try to carry on a conversation and walk. Back in the pocket it went.

Then, moments later, I heard, in the unmistakable voice of a chipmunk, "Oh look, a text message. Thank you Jesus." I fished out the phone again. It read, "911 emergency. Come home now." I called my daughter and she said that TJ was doubled over in pain and I needed to come home now.

Of course, I immediately turned around and headed home.

When I got home, I found that TJ was better, and the kids still needed rides to work. TJ's pain was a digestion issue. So, I took the kids to work, stopped and got her some OTC meds and came home. She is currently laying down allowing the meds to work.

My interrupted walk turned out to be 1.9 miles. It is short of one of my goals, but still meets the goal of walking farther each day.

There is still tomorrow. There will be no kids to take to work. There will be no need for TJ to be up and about.

So, sometime tomorrow morning, before the sun breaks across the tops of the trees, I will be out there, walking, with my MP3 player playing, my house-key and my phone in my pockets, and a barrier waiting to be surpassed.

I'll see ya on the other side of 2 miles.

The Goal I meet and reset most every day

My walking goal each day has been to walk farther than the day before. In the three and a half weeks I have been walking I have progressed from three-tenths of a mile on August 17th, to one and three-quarter miles today, September 9th.

I remember the first day I walked around the block. It was terrible. I hurt all over, mostly. I think the only part that didn’t really hurt were my calves. That was only because they weren’t smart enough to hurt yet. It took me 20 minutes to walk the .33 mile. That is an astounding pace of about one mile per hour.

According to USRoads.com, the average walking pace for elderly adults is 2.8 mph as compared to young adults at 3.4 mph. I am much closer to the elderly group in age and body. Mentally, well, that is a different story.

Today’s walk of 1.75 miles was at a pace of 2.3 mph. So, I haven’t made it to what the walking world considers average, but I am happy with my 26 minute mile, for now. After all, my mile time has increased for walking a mile in 60 minutes to walking one in 26 minutes. Some days it actually gets as fast as one mile in 24 minutes.

I have found that as my distance increases, my time follows suit eventually.

As for now, I will be happy with the goal I meet and reset nearly every day. We will see what tomorrow will bring.

What .. was I insane?

I decided on trying a new route for my morning walk. My walk is up to 1.5 miles. I usually walk through town, one block off of Main street, which happens to be the street upon which I live. From my house to one block past the Library and back, then around the block is 1.5 miles. Today, I decided to do a walk around a cemetery that is about 3-tenths of a mile from the house.

Omigosh ! .. The first leg nearly killed me. It seemed to be straight uphill.

It is nearly at the peak you see in this pic.

But .. I made to the cemetery. Then around was down and up and down and up and then up some more.

This was one of the views. My house is in the clump of trees in the upper left of this pic (which is way downhill from where I was standing.)

another view inside the cemetery..

This is the view from the bridge between the two halves of the cemetery, which overlooks the road I eventually walked back down to get home.

I feel the burn .. or it that just the insanity talking?

Good-bye old friend

This is my cane. I have been using it for most of the walking I have done for a while. It is a great cane and conversation piece. It is an African Chieftain's cane. It is the symbol of his authority. In tribal meetings, it identifies the Chief as the Chief.

It was a gift to a missionary to Nigeria. That missionary was a close friend to our family. I have slept on his floor when I was preaching for his dad when he was pastoring a church in Ohio. His son was married to my sister. He married my wife and I seven years ago.

He gave the cane as a gift to my father. My father pastored a church in Lexington for 39 years. My father passed away three years ago. My friend, the missionary/pastor passed away about two years ago.

I was visiting Mom several months ago and noticed the cane leaning against a wall in the garage collecting dust. I asked Mom what she was going to do with it. She told me to take it. I did. I cleaned it and treated it. I have been using it for walking assistance.

As you may (or may not) have read in my previous posts, I have been walking for exercise. This morning I walked 1.2 miles in my morning walk. I was talking to one of my daughters about it and she asked if I had been using the cane.

As the matter of fact, I have not.

Since I started walking through the pain two weeks ago, I have not used the cane. It will have a place of respect and honor at my home. It is a great reminder.

It is a reminder of a dear friend.

It is a reminder of a mission.

It is a reminder of a calling.

It is a reminder of a day when the pain stopped me from walking.

It is a reminder of the time I took back my walk.

Good-bye old friend.

Unbelievable…

I have never been the kind of person to set goals. Well, at least not the kind to write them down. I’ve always kept my goals in my head. That way if I don’t accomplish them, there’s no glaring reminder of the failure.

When I began this diet and then later began to exercise by walking, I didn’t set any long-term goals or even short term goals. The walk was just a walk. I did plan to increase it, but there were no real preset increments of extension. My first walk was just around the block. That was between .25 and .3 mile and it took me twenty minutes to complete. Yes, I was that out of shape.

Of course, at that time I had an incredible defense. I have arthritis in my back and my weight makes my knees hurt. More importantly, the muscles in my lower back completely fatigued many years ago and I had to go through physical therapy to be able to walk at all without pain. Walking would bring on the tightness quickly. The tightness would bring on the pain. The pain would bring out the wimp.

I began using a cane to help take some of the stress off of my lower back. Even then, five minutes would bring on the tightness, the pain, and the wimp. The term ‘within walking distance’ had a whole different meaning for me. I would go to the store only if I had a cart to lean on. Most of the time, I would be a ‘sit in the truck and wait’ kind of shopper.

That first walk was two weeks ago. The first change was in the amount of time it took to walk around the block. As the time got shorter quickly, I set my sights on going farther. My block included a large hill up and down. The up part stressed my back and the down part increased the pressure on my knees. This was not being a wimp, it was being conscious of the stress I was putting my body under.

I mapped out a slightly longer route on a more even terrain. I would walk down the street I lived on toward town and then turn a walk back. Not every day, but nearly, I would increase it by a landmark or block. It was four tenths. Then it was five tenths; then six, and seven tenths. The seven tenth walk was just last night. It brought my daily walk total to 1.8 miles.

This morning I got up with my back hurting and my ankle feeling a little tender. I figured I wouldn’t walk or if I did it would not be for a long distance. I put my walking clothes on. I had my phone for any emergency that might arise. I had my MP3 player and headphones (I listen to the Bible when I walk.) I was ready. Out the door I went.

I walked a little gingerly on the ankle at first. However, as the walk progressed, the pain subsided, not completely, but enough. I walked past my first previous turning point. I kept going. I walked past my second previous turning point. Still going. I passed the third and fourth points. Then I was at the place where I turned around last night. I still had walking left in me, so I went on. I finally stopped at the library and turned around. It was cool (under 70°) but the sun was right in my face on the return trip.

When I got home, I went to spark and plotted my course. I was somewhat shocked when the total distance read, 1.12 mile.

It was not a goal I had set on paper. It was a goal that was in my head, eventually, somewhere down the road.

In two weeks I had gone from a weak complaining 20 minute three-tenth of a mile walk to a 26 minute, no complaint, 1.1 mile walk.

Unbelievable.